Banner of a Different Sort
by Stepherz
Summary: * Chapter 10 Finally Posted! * What if best friends kiss? What if the like it? What happens when two best friends find out a secret about themselves? [ as you can tell I suck at summaries ^-^ ]
1. The Day the Sun Died

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Disclaimer - I own the plot, and nothing else as of now.  
**Summary -** What if best friends realize a secret about themselves? What if they kiss? What if they _like_ it? [as you can tell I suck at summaries .]  
**Dedication -** I would like to dedicate this fiction to Victory Thru Tears, Star, Princess of Mirkwood, Dana, Aqua Lion, Joyful and Saturniia. These fantastic writers have influenced me greatly. I owe so much to each of them. Thank you all.  
**Rating** **- **It's rated R. 1- It's a slash. 2- Language. And 3- Possible -Mild- Smut [along with Adult Themes]  
**Important -** This happens with the idea in mind that Jack did **NOT** kiss David's sister. I repeat - He did NOT kiss her.  
**AN - **This is my first Newsies fic…bear with me. And I'm not really going to write how they pronounce the words, so you'll have to use your imagination. The º things in the story mean that they may need explanation - which will be viewable at the bottom of the page. And Race's name is fixed…sorry about that. =^.^=

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The Day the Sun Died  
By Stepherz

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Jack's POVº

I woke up tired. The sun dipped over the rooftops, and fluttered across my pallid cheeks. I smiled, and inhaled slowly. The first breath of the morning - I sometimes wished it would never end. The relaxation of drowsiness floated over me, and I yawned. As I slid down from the fire escape before David woke up. I didn't want him to lecture me about how I should have come inside. I liked sleeping outside.

New York, New York - Such a great city, they had to name it twice. I jumped the spare feet down onto the ground. The pavement hit my worn shoes, and I bent my knees as a reflex. I looked down the street, and there was a group of the Newsies coming. They looked tired, like me. Racetrack smiled, and dodged through a crowd before slapping my shoulder.

"G'mornin' to ya, Mister Kelly." I smiled, and slugged him playfully in the stomach.

"Good mornin' street rats." I hollered to the gang of boys that neared us. They laughed, and jogged to meet us.

Crutchy lagged, and frowned as he hobbled towards us. "Wait up, you guys!"

Kid Blink, Mush, and Skittery halted in front of me. Crutchy caught up, and Racetrack recuperated. David came out the door, he smiled weakly.

"The kid's sick." I smirked. I'd taught him to pretend to be sick to trigger pity among customers. David eyed me.

"No, really. He's sick, Jack. He's got the flu." I frowned, and the rest of the boys looked half-heartedly sympathetic.

"He'll get better. I'll go visit him after I sell all me Telies."

He sighed, but looked content. We all walked to Weasel's. 

I remembered our striking days. Those days were pretty great. I'd had to keep it pretty low-key these days. I mean, our relationship. Yeah, me 'n' Mush. It might seem really weird, but yeah, that's us. Around the guys I couldn't let them catch on. So me 'n' Mush kept it quiet.

I cast him a glance, and he averted his gaze quickly. I didn't really know where our 'relationship' stood. We hadn't talked in a while, well, a few days, and he seemed to be avoiding me. It hurt, I had to admit. But I guess I'd caused him a lot of pain too.

I stepped on his foot, and he looked up at me, his brows furrowing. I smiled, and brushed his arm, urging him to stay back with me, as I let the others pass us. He waited until everyone was gone, before he turned to look at me.

"Jack?"

"Mush, I'm coming back to the Lodging House." He looked delighted.

"Really?"

"Yeah…I'm stayin' for good this time." His face lit up in the dim morning sun, and the breeze faintly affected his hair. He reminded me of a god…He looked so perfect.

"That's great, Jack!" I smiled.

"We have a lot of catching up to do." He grinned, sensing my purpose.

Sometimes when I was around him, I felt…well…giddy, and elated. He nodded in agreement, and I pulled him into a dark alley. The dust made him sneeze, as I dragged him through a heap of garbage, and waded knee-deep into the trash. Once safe from prying eyes at the back of the alley, save the crows that perched atop the clothes-lines which trained from building to building across the narrow passage.

He took off his newsboy hat, revealing the naturally curly black/brown hair of his. I smiled, and he smiled. At first it seemed awkward, but I tugged at his suspenders, and he obligingly stepped forward. Our faces were but inches apart, and I exhaled against his cheek. The moist air reflected, and came back into my own face.

He licked his lips, a faint gleam becoming apparent on them. My body quivered with anticipation. I pulled him closer, and he raised his hands to my cheeks. My hands were at his waist, and I careened him still closer. Our faces were barely an inch apart. My fingers roved up his back, to his shoulders. My elbows bent just under his arms, and he settled his own arms around my neck.

I observed his face carefully. Every detail of the façade in which I'd been charmed by. He seemed to be memorizing my appearance as well. I could stand it no longer. I pressed my lips to his, my tongue evading his lips, and progressing to his mouth. It explored the cavern with long-harnessed passion. The duet was hardly one-sided. He navigated through my own mouth, while holding me capture with his hand, at the nape of my neck. Our kiss was one of truly mutual longing - it had been so long since our last.

Reluctantly, I pulled away from him, though our limbs remained entwined, and close. I smiled. I was satisfied. His lips dusted my cheek, and ran along my cheekbone. I tilted my head, to give him a wider span. He ranged down my throat, then back to my lips. I wanted this moment to reign forever.

Finally - it was just Mush and me…finally.

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º - POV = Point of Veiw…Therefore, this chapter was from Jack's Point of Veiw…or perspective.


	2. The Re-birth [of the sun]

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AN - I am so glad to get positive reviews on this! I love feedback -- I love it! =]  
**Important -** This is a short chapter…I know. It's very short, in fact. But, it's short for a reason, and is just pretty much introducing you. The next few chapters may also be short. Simply to let you know, I am well aware that the chapter's length is somewhat brief. --Stepherz

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The Re-birth  
By Stepherz

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Mush's POV

I crept from the alley, and ran to the end of the line at Weasel's. I waited for less than a minute, then Jack appeared. He smiled, and stopped in line in back of me. When it was my turn, I asked for 50 papes, and paid the debt. I stepped out of the way, and waited at the bottom of the steps for Jack.

With fifty papes in his hand, he strolled down to meet me. With a casual grin, he slapped my shoulder.

"Looks like you're my sellin' partner today." I smiled.

"No objections here."

We moved into a square, crowded with people moving off to work. Jack found a barrel, and stood on it. I was next to it, the lowly spectator. He smiled, and thrust his newspaper into the sky.

"Extra! Extra! Explosion on 54th street!" He grinned down at me, and I couldn't help but laugh and shake my head. I found a bench, and stood on that…I joined in with Jack, to make up a truly horrendous headline.

In counter to his declaration, "Thousands of lives at risk!"

"Numerous injuries."

"Several casualties!"

And so it went, on and on. We'd made this story up about a blown fuse in one of the flats on 54th street. After an hour or two, we'd sold all 150 papes. Good, that meant we wouldn't have to eat them. We jumped down from our very productive perches, and I memorized the area in case we ever came back.

We made our way to the Lodging House. I was so elated. I mean, Jack was coming back! I felt my pulse quicken with excitement as we neared the building. I was leading the way, and I turned to look at him. For some strange reason, I had a feeling he wasn't really going to stay.  
"Are you sure this is what you want?" He smiled.  
"It's a roof, and it's getting colder outside. I can't be a guttersnipe forever, y'know." I knew.

"Okay then, but it's pretty full…" He laughed, and shoved me forward.  
"You act like you don't want me to stay." He turned and slugged him gently in the shoulder.  
"You know better, too." He smiled, and we walked forward.  
We were a rather awkward couple, I'm sure. I mean, he was the genius, and me…well, I wasn't the brightest bulb on the tree. He was taller than I was too, and older. I kind of felt like he shadowed me sometimes. Like, he was better…plain and simple. I took care to keep quiet when I felt like this, because he'd catch onto my bitterness, and then we'd sure get right down to the problem.

As we walked into the room, every one greeted Jack as if he were a king. Maybe he was. I walked silently over to my bunk. I'd gotten used to him having so much attention. I don't think I get jealous really easily, but I have to get used to the idea before I'm totally okay with it. I watched as he plowed through them. Luckily, he was a pretty tall guy, and he smiled at me over their heads. Once he was through, he looked around.  
"So, Which bunk's mine?" A few kids scattered off their bunks, and he laughed. "I don't want to take a bunk from anyone."

"They're all taken, in that case." Specs shouted from his shared bunk. Some of the boys had to share bunks, because there were so many residents. The moment was kind of awkward as Jack looked around, deciding which bunk he would share. The majority of them were already shared, and he cast me a secretive look. I knew which bunk he'd pick.

After a moment, a raspy voice shouted up the stairs. "Lights out!"

At least a dozen boys moved to turn the lights out. Jack walked over to my bed, took off his hat, and slipped under the covers without bothering to undress. I suppose he was very tired. He shifted against me, and I reached for him. The room was pitch black, and I couldn't see him, or anything for that matter. My hand caught his, and I held it there. He pressed his lips against the ridge of my knuckles, I wondered if anyone had night-vision, and could see us. Common sense won over on that one, and I shifted so that I was facing him. He put his head on my chest, and I rolled onto my back. He was in my arms, and that's all that mattered to me. 

"Goodnight Mush" He whispered, and I smiled, not that he could see it.  
"Goodnight Jack."

Slowly, he drifted to sleep. I could feel his breathing level, and he seemed heavier. I stroked his cheek, and kissed his forehead silently. I was content simply to hold him, and I began to drift off to sleep.

Suddenly, I wondered what would happen if they found us like this in the morning. I shifted as gently as possible away from him. The beds were small, and were definitely not made for boys our size, not to mention _two_ boys of our size. 

I felt more secure, and reluctantly closed my eyes. The bliss of sleep enclosed me.


	3. Good Morning!

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Good Morning!  
By Stepherz

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Jack's POV

I woke up and looked around. The others were all asleep. I yawned, and stretched my arms far above my head.

Shards of broken gold peeked through the mud-coated glass of the windows. Mush's face gleamed in the early morning light. I could hear the pigeons squawking outside. Their morning symphony of 'the hungry birds' was enough to wake me up.

Mush was on his side, nearly on the edge of his bed. Yeah, it was _his_ bed. I looked around the room, to make sure no one else was awake. Boots stirred under his sheets, but didn't wake.

I rolled Mush onto his back and his eyes fluttered open. I leaned over him. He smiled the gentle smile that I'd fallen in love with.

A rush of guilt swept over me. There was no doubt in my mind that Mush was nothing but faithful to me…but me, well…Let's just say I got around. It seemed like once I got bored with one, I moved onto another…I got bored very easily, too. There were very few who could hold my interest. In this case, it was Mush and……

I pulled him away from the edge of the mattress, and he furrowed his brows at me. I placed a feather light kiss on his forehead. He laughed softly and pushed me daintily away, making a face.

"Um…Morning breath!" He made a mock-disgusted look, and I elbowed him.

"And I bet you smell like an angel."

He nodded, smiling. I smiled, and loomed over him, closing in.

"Let's find out then, shall we?" I pressed my lips gingerly to his, taking his cheek in my palm. Our tongues darted over each other, and I reluctantly pulled away. I swallowed, and looked down at him.

"If that's what you call angel-scent, I'd hate to smell the devil." I laughed nearly inaudibly. I didn't want to wake the others up.

He smiled, and pressed his forehead to mine. His gaze lingered on my eyes, before closing slowly.

"I'm so glad you decided to come back." He whispered.

"I'm glad I came back." I whispered back.

We heard another stir, and separated quickly.

Specs rolled absently out of his bunk. Mush got up, so he could use the washroom before the rest woke. I followed him silently.

Specs smiled, and disappeared through the door. I got dressed and ready to go quickly. By the time I finished, the others were awake. I slid down the banister of the stairs. Mush was waiting for me at the bottom.

"G'mornin'." He smiled.

"Well, good mornin' yourself!" I laughed at his stiffness and shoved him out the door.

"Good. We're early this mornin'." I was referring to the fact that we'd get our papers and be out selling before the rest of them.

He nodded, and we set of to Weasel's.

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After we'd sold all our papes, Mush and I walked back towards the lodging house. We hadn't seen hair or hide of the others all that day. Mush seemed kind of nervous, so I tried to set his nerves at ease.

"Look, Mush. There's David. See, they ain't plottin' against us." I smiled.

Sure enough, David was marching towards us. Mush looked less than thrilled.

"Hey Jack…You forgot to visit Les yesterday." He eyed me coldly.

"Aw, gosh David…Sorry. It slipped my mind."

He glared at Mush, who tilted his head.

"So what's going on with you, Mush?" David nearly spat at him.

I swallowed. Oh no…

"Listen, David. I know we ain't great pals or nothing, but you can treat me decent y'know." I smiled. Leave it to Mush. The kid wasn't as dim-witted as everyone thought.

David scowled.

"I'm not wasting anymore of my brain on you." I frowned.

David had become incredibly hotheaded since the end of the strike. Sure, the kid was smart…but he'd been acting like a real numbskull. I raised my eyebrows at him, and he shrugged carelessly.

"What are you lookin' at me like that for?" He frowned deeply.

"Why're you treatin' Mush like he ain't worth the time o' day?" This was going to heat up if something didn't stop us.

Mush looked frantically between us, as we advanced in showdown style towards each other.

"Why are you so busy defending Mush when you should be visiting a little boy that has the flu?" He seemed pleased with himself, but he really didn't convince me.

"Mush is my friend too, David. I can't spend all my time with you, or Les." He turned to Mush.

"Well, you've spent nearly two whole days with _him_."

"So?" I watched as Mush backed away.

"So, what kind of a hypocrite are you?" He shoved Mush. I felt my blood begin to boil.

I reached for David's shirt, spinning him around to face me.

"Leave him alone." He glared at me.

"Why are you defending him?"

"Why can't you get along with him? He ain't done nothin' to you."

He seemed to be thinking when Mush walked back towards us, dusting himself off.

"Look, Jack. I don't know what's going on here, but I don't like it."

I narrowed my eyes.

"What are you talkin' about?"

Mush looked nervous.

"I ain't stupid, Jack." He glared at Mush. "I can see that something's goin' on here."

I swallowed. I felt as nervous as Mush looked.

"I don't know what you're talkin' about, David."

"You and Mush! Do I have to paint a picture, Jack? I want to know what's going on."

Mush and I exchanged confused glances, though we both knew what he was talking about.

"Right now!" David demanded. The look in his eye was of pure anger. He was beyond angry…

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AN - Bwahaha! The evil truth comes out between the next chapter, and the 5th. 


	4. Doom's Day

AN - Okay, enough fluff, right? Angst time! Enjoy…

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Doom's Day  
By Stepherz

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Mush's POV

David scowled at Jack. There was something in the way he frowned, and eyed him that sent shivers down my spine. I knew Jack was the type to keep secrets, but I never thought he'd keep 'em from me!

I looked at him; he was glaring back at David. It was like they were having a conversation, all in their eyes. Finally, Jack snorted.

"I ain't got nothin' to say to you!" He proclaimed.

"You…you…for…him?" He sounded enraged.

I looked back and forth between them.

"Nah. She wasn't my type." Oooh…David's sister.

"Do you know how you hurt her?" Somehow, I didn't think David would be so emotional about Sarah, his sister.

"David…stop it." Jack frowned.

David was closing the gap between he and Jack.

"David…" Jack warned, looking very uncomfortable. But David didn't stop. He shoved Jack, who landed on his behind. I rushed forward, standing between he and David.

"What the hell do you think you're doing, Davie?" He tried to shove past me, in vain. I was younger, true, but I was a lot stronger than he was. Jack got up, and eyed him.

"Get outta my way, Mush." David snarled.

Jack stepped forward, his voice shaky.

"Okay, so you know, Davie…so there's nothing for me to hide." He looked at me, a devilish gleam appearing in his eyes. David looked frantic, as he frowned at us both.

I swallowed, unaware of what was going on. Jack, in a great sweeping motion, lifted me off my feet and into his arms. He carried me, as a groom does a bride, forward towards David. We were getting funny looks, of course, but Jack continued. He stooped to his knees, and laid me on the ground. I knew better than to question, or struggle. When Jack got like he was then, it was better not to try and reason.

David was glaring at us, as he towered easily above our heads. Jack leaned over me, and enveloped me in a fiery kiss. I heard David inhale sharply, but I was a little too preoccupied to see what he was doing. I wrapped my arms around Jack's neck, and he lifted my shoulders up, his arms sliding under them.

He lifted me gradually to my feet, and when we stopped, David's jaw was hanging open, his eyes wide with fury. Jack smiled at me, and tapped David's cheek. He seemed to snap out of a trance-like state, and gritted his teeth.

"Damn you, Jack Kelly." He turned, and stomped off…back down the street, and to where his house must have been located.

I turned and looked at Jack, frowning.

"What was that?" I asked, as he smiled.

"Nothing, really." I narrowed my eyes, and he frowned.

"It was nothing!" He nearly shouted, shifting to face me.

"Oh, yeah…right, Jack." Umm…yeah, that was lame of me.

"Mush, it was." I shrugged.

"Fine, if you say so." It really irked me sometimes, how he seemed to think I was dumb or something. I notice things too!

We walked slowly towards the lodging house. The silence was odd, especially for us. I hate arguments…even tiny ones, like this.

The sun was beginning to set. The hues of gold, magenta, lavender, and cerulean blended in the sky. The daystar slipped like honey from its mighty perch, and effortlessly disappeared behind the buildings of New York City. All that was left, as evidence of such beauty, were the tones of the sky. In its brilliant azure tainted crimson. It left the shadows, the lonely shadows that cast long and weary shape-shifters through the streets.

Jack stopped abruptly, and I turned to look at him questioningly. He sighed, and started to pace.

"Something wrong, Jack?" I averted my gaze to the cobblestone on the ground.

"I'm going to be in Brooklyn tomorrow," He watched me carefully, "I'm gonna leave tonight, so I can come home faster tomorrow night."

I raised an eyebrow, frowning at him. Yeah, back to the secrets, eh?

"Why are you going to Brooklyn?" I knew better than to expect a straight answer.

"Business."

"Oh?"

"Yeah." He bit his lip.

"Then I'll come!" I began to smile.

"No!" He looked as surprised as I felt. That was a bit, forceful.

"Uh, okay then."

He sighed, and shook his head. I took a step towards the lodging house door.

"Mush…"

"Jack?" I hate it when we play these games.

"Look, I'll be back tomorrow - before sunset. I promise." I shrugged.

"Well, everything's fine, then…you promise." I fought the urge to dart inside, knowing that as long as I was in there he wouldn't bother me. It was strange…just a bit earlier that day I'd felt so close to him, as if everything we'd been through was worth it. Like it was worth everything! Now, I wasn't sure. The secrets…the secrets. It bothered me…a lot.

Jack, being perceptive, tugged at my shoulder.

"What's bothering you, now?" He seemed kind of blameful.

"Nothing…"

"Nothing?" Doubtful…

"Nothing!" I spun on my heel and walked into the lodging house, where I looked out the window at him.

He sighed, his shoulders heaving gently, and stared at the façade of the house for a while. He reluctantly turned, and walked down the road; onward to Brooklyn.

Suddenly, I got a bright idea. I was going to follow him.

Quickly, I took my coat from my bed, and rushed after him. He was no where to be seen, but I knew the road to Brooklyn well. I started off, looking rather warily about me to make sure that Jack wasn't around.

The sky was getting darker, and the moon shone brightly from its throne in the abyss of cobalt. It seemed oddly enchanting, though the sky, however star-studded it might be, couldn't cheer me up on this night. Something told me, that the road forward was only going to get worse.

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AN - Okay, this is my first real "angst" chapter in the story - please tell me what you think! Ya'll know I love feedback! ~-^ lol


	5. Spring Fever

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Spring Fever  
By Stepherz

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Jack's POV

I hated to leave Mush like that, but I decided that he'd get over it soon enough. The stars were all I had to guide me that night, save the moon, and my blinding emotions. The moon would every so often, duck behind a cloud, shadowing my way and leaving my passage temporarily barred.

There were two things on my mind: Mush and Spot.

I shivered; realizing that everything I'd been doing was going to catch up to me sooner or later. As if the guilt wasn't enough.

I wasn't far from my destination. I rounded the corner, now in Spot's territory. I was immediately given rather dirty looks, but several recognized me, and walked over.

"What are you doin' here, cowboy?" A tall boy in slacks, and suspenders eyed me.

"I got business. Where's Spot?"

A figure landed on the pavement next to me. The shadows concealed its identity, and I raised my eyebrows at it.

It stepped out, into the light of the moon. Spot grinned at me. I barely recognized him.

He was taller than the last time I'd seen him, which had been nearly three months before. I knew it was he, from the adorable sullen smirk that he wore across his pale façade.

He glared at the tall boy next to me.

"You givin' Jacky-boy any trouble?"

"No, Spot…I mean, sir." The male mumbled, stuttering slightly.

"Good." He snapped, and smirked at me. "Well?"

"Uh…" I looked at the boy next to us, and he rolled his eyes, but obediently walked back down an alley, disappearing from view.

"It's been a while, aye Jack?"

"Yeah, I guess it has." It always started awkward like this.

"You must be hungry…"

"Not really." We started walking towards the dock, for no real reason.

When we were alone, on the pier, Spot turned to me.

"I missed you."

"I missed you too."

"Why didn't you come back for so long?" He turned, looking over the ocean as he spoke.

"I don't know."

"You know…I haven't seen you since the strike ended."

"Yeah…I know."

He sighed, still looking out across the sea.

We must have stayed like that, in silence, for an hour or so, before I dared break the mute-void.

"I came here for you, Spot."

He turned back to me. His figure was outlined perfectly as the crest of the sun poked over the horizon.

I reached for him, and he obligingly stepped forward. Our bodies melted as I caught him in an impassioned kiss.

He ran his hands up my inner-thighs and I felt the chills run through me. My hands danced over his spine, as we sank to the ground.

My lips sank to his throat, teasing the area gently. My hands clawed at his back, and tore the shirt half-off. He ripped my own shirt from my shoulders, as I completed my task, his shirt lying on the ground next to us.

He made a low, hoarse sound, and I paused, looking at him. He smiled.

"I love you Jack." My voice caught in my throat, but I managed to squeak out a weak reply.

"I love you too, Spot." He sighed softly, but threw his arms around my neck.

"Take me." He whispered softly. His eyes held the yearning that my body felt, as it shook suddenly with desire.

I could do nothing but obey his wishes. I had no objections, of course, since it was my inclination as well.

The night was filled with nothing less than endless pleasures…pleasure that I would not soon forget. However, we were not totally sex-driven, seeing as we knew that in the morning there would be questions if we were found together in this position. We re-dressed, and soon after, we fell asleep.

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We were huddled next to a crate, as the sun rose to great the madness that it presumably held.

Spot stroked my cheek as I stared into his eyes, the sun reflecting in them from behind me.

"Jack…"

"Yeah?"

"Thank you."

I didn't know what to say, so I pressed my lips to his in a feather-soft kiss.

He never ceased to take my breath away. I cupped his cheek with my hand, kissing him tenderly, once more.

"Come back with me, Spot." I regretted the words before I said them, as my thoughts returned to the others.

"We've had this conversation before." He sighed.

"I know, but…"

"No buts, cowboy. You're their leader, and I'm the leader o' Brooklyn. There's no way I can come with ya." I sighed, defeated.

"Okay."

He pressed my head to his chest, and kissed my forehead.

"Can you hear that?" I looked up at him.  
  
"Hear what?"

"Listen…" He pressed my ear closer to his torso, and I listened docilely.

"All I can hear is your heart beatin'."

"It's beating for you, Jack." I flushed a bright red, and smiled coyly.

No one, save Mush, had ever said anything so sweet to me.

Suddenly, there was a rustling and Spot stood up, leaving my on the wood below him. I stood, less alertly, more stiffly, than he did.

By the time I stood on my own to feet, he was rampaging through the crates of fish, supplies, netting, ect.

"Come out, you little weasel!" He shouted. If I hadn't been so worried, I would have been amused, but in this case, I wasn't near laughing.

I joined the chase, though more discretely.

Spot and I rounded the same corner, coming to a dead end in the maze of wooden boxes.

There, in front of us, huddled on the ground, to my disdain, was Mush. The look on Spot's face was of confusion, and anger. The look on my face must have been pained, confused, angry, and suicidal, because Mush's contorted to something I'd never seen before.

Mush had tears in his eyes.


	6. If Looks Could Kill I

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If Looks Could Kill I  
By Stepherz

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Mush's POV

My first thought was _Wow…it's beautiful._ I mean, two people with obvious passion for each other, if not simply lust, making love under a pale golden sky, with an ocean background, and the sea spray crashing gently with the breeze against the stalks that held the dock up. It _was_ beautiful.

My second thought was _Wait a minute…that's Jack. _My_ Jack!_ I knew he'd been hiding things from me, but how could I ever trust him again? How _could_ I have ever trusted him? I was stupid! Just plain old stupid! I should have known…I really should have known. It was too good to be true. Way too good.

My third thought was _Uh oh…I'm gonna die._ Spot and Jack had me cornered. I was scared for my life. The Brooklyn Newsie could be touch - and incredibly dangerous. Jack, he could be _more_ dangerous when he had intent. I had no doubt in my mind that I would definitely not make it out of there unscathed.

Jack towered over me, his face was hidden from Spots view, and he shook his head.

I realized that I had tears in my eyes, and quickly, silently, repressed them. I couldn't cry in front of them! I couldn't let Jack see how much he'd hurt me.

I inhaled slowly, and my gaze met Spot's. His eyes were cold, and hard as they condemned me. I swallowed harshly, my gullet moving dramatically up and down.

Spot stepped forward. His expression was heartless. He was nothing but cruel.

"How much did you see, Mush?" His tone was softer than I had expected it to be.

I looked down, at the wooden boards of the dock.

"All of it…" I mumbled, very quietly.

I'd taken a short cut and practically run the entire way to Brooklyn. I got there just as they walked out onto the dock. At first I didn't think anything was going to happen, but…look how wrong I was.

Spot cursed under his breath, and eyed Jack.

"He followed you." Jack caught my gaze for a moment.

"Why don't you let me deal with him, Spot. I was just gonna go back anyway. I'll take him with me…"

Spot looked tentative, but sighed, nodding.

"Okay, Jack. Deal with it." He frowned, spit in his hand, and held it out to Jack.

Jack did the same and they shook hands firmly.

Spot took me by the collar of my shirt and lifted me off the ground.

"You'll regret this night, Mushy." He sneered, and I cringed. He had quite a stench.

He released me, and Jack walked off, obviously expecting me to follow. I did so, begrudgingly.

I knew Spot was watching us, as we walked off. I knew that I would definitely keep away from Brooklyn for as long as I could.

As we walked, slowly, along the streets of Brooklyn, I could see that we were getting vague, and incredibly nasty looks from the Brooklyn Newsies. It was actually quite amusing, and if I wasn't in suck a horrible fix, I might have made a face at them, or even laughed.

We were walking along the Brooklyn bridge, and Jack kept looking out over the side. I could tell he wanted to talk to me, but he was waiting until we were well out of range of Brooklyn.

About half way across the river, he turned to me.

"I'm sorry, Mush."

"Save your apologies, they don't mean anything to me."

"Sure they do." He frowned.

I shook my head. I turned to walk to Manhattan, where I would hide from him. I was afraid…I mean, being on this bridge with him. He could easily throw me over the side. I was strong, but he was older, taller, and he had a greater mass to propell me with. I was very uneasy.

As I stepped away from him, in the direction of 'home', he caught my sleeve and turned me around to face him.

"Mush - I can't let you go back like this." I stiffened. Just what was he getting at?

"I'm going back, Jack."

"You can't tell them." His young face was lined with worry.

"That's the first thing I'm gonna do! Why shouldn't they know? Why should I hide from them, the reason why you're not going back?"

"What do you mean, I'm not going back?"

"You're actually gonna go back. I mean…oh, hell, Jack - Why don't you just stay in Brooklyn?"

He looked hurt - more hurt than before.

"I hafta come back."

"And why?"

"Well…oh, hell yourself, Mush! It's not what you think!"

My eyes dilated, and my jaw dropped as I glared at him. If looks could kill.

"Not what I think? Not what I…Jack, you can't tell me that's something other than what I think! You just screwed the leader o' Brooklyn - you can't tell me I'm wrong!"

Jack looked defeated.

"No, you're right about that. But, it wasn't just a spur of the moment thing…"

"I should hope not!" I pursed my lips, and glared out over the water.

Jack and I had never…you know. I was content the way it was. Maybe if I had, he wouldn't have gone to…Oh, stop it, Mush - don't think like that - it wouldn't have made a difference.

So we hadn't ever done that. I don't think I ever really trusted him. Not like I should have, at least. I knew he trusted me, and would have trusted me with his life if ever the need aroused.

"Look, Jack. We'll get along just fine without you!" I turned and sped, running the rest of the way across the bridge.

Jack was hot on my heels. 

He glared at me, stopping in front of me and anticipating my every move as I tried to dodge past him.

He knocked me to the ground, and pinned me. His face was flushed with anxiety.

"You're gonna listen to me, and you're not gonna complain about it."

I tensed. This was going to be a conversation to remember.


	7. If Looks Could Kill II

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If Looks Could Kill II  
By Stepherz

****

Jack's POV

I had him pinned, and he wasn't going anywhere. My breath was erratic, and I let it calm down before I started talking again.

The afternoon sun was high and smoldering over our heads. It felt like were in an oven, it was so warm. The sun was performing its ritualistic dip behind the buildings, and although the sun was warm, a gust of wind sent me shivering.

I sighed softly, looking down at Mush. This was all wrong.

"Listen, Mush…I've known Spot since we was a mere eight. I used to live in Brooklyn. Spot knew me back when I was Francis Sullivan. He was there for me before I came to Manhattan. Mush, you gotta understand." I bit my lip, he would never understand.

"I don't gotta do anything. There ain't a single explanation that you could give me that would make up for what you did." He seemed firm, which shook my emotions further.

"Damn it, Mush! Please, try and understand…"

"I can't understand something like that."

"Just try!"

"No!" His face wrinkled in indignant anger, and I shook my head.

"Okay, don't." I paused, inhaling deeply.

He watched me for a moment, before frowning a sullen frown - the frown I would not soon forget.

"I don't want you to understand, so you don't have to." He raised his eyebrows at me, and I decided to indulge him.

My emotions were boiling over, and my eyes were growing misty, so I continued without further ado, scared that I might back down if I didn't.

"You don't know what it's like to love two people. You have no idea how it feels to be so torn apart." A tear spilled from my eye, and landed on his cheek. 

"I love you, and I love him. The moment I laid eyes on you, I knew what I was feeling was wrong, but I couldn't help it. It's been years for us, Mush…years. I don't want you to know how I feel."

He sighed softly, and bit his lip.

"I would never wish this kind of pain on you…never. You hear me? Don't ever let yourself fall in love twice…it's not worth it."

My thoughts were swirling in a mass of melancholy in my mind. I was glad to have laid everything out on the table…or, almost everything. He looked up at me, his eyes narrowed skeptically.

"How many others have you 'fallen in love' with?"

How could I answer that? It was an unfair question…like I said before, I get bored easily, and I certainly get around. I had to choose my words carefully.

"I'd rather not say." I stumbled over my words, and they didn't seem like mine as they escaped from my lips.

"How many?" He nearly shouted, his tone more firm than before.

The color drained from my cheeks leaving them pale and ghostly as I looked away.

"How many, goddamn it!" He hissed, trying to keep his voice down so as not to disturb the people, who were already giving us strange looks.

It's not every day you see two boys having emotional spars at the edge of the Brooklyn Bridge.

"A lot, Mush…" His expression, in turn, faded. The fact that he had dark hair made him look even more ethereal.

"Who?" His voice was soft.

"Don't do this, Mush-"

"Who?" He put it firmly.

__

I was in power. _I_ had _him_ pinned. Why did I feel so dominated by him, then?

Before I knew what was happening, a list of names was drawn from my mouth.

"David, Race, Blink, Boots, Dutchy…there are more, I'd rather not…"

"So all this time, you've just been screwing them over?" The reality was sinking in - I was in a ditch, with no rope, and no latter to get myself out.

"No…it's not like that."

"Then explain to me, how _is_ it?"

"Mush - I made lots of mistakes, but it's over…what's done is done."

"So you're going to give up Spot?" I knew what he was getting at.

I couldn't give up Spot. Spot was a part of me…a huge part. The tears in my eyes streamed freely down my cheeks. Mush shook his head at me. Guys like us don't cry. I wiped them away carelessly, and finally released Mush from the hold.

"Go, then. I'm sorry - but sorry's not good enough. Not for what I've done."

Mush hesitated, and I looked pointedly at him.

"I love you."

He frowned and narrowed his eyes. I watched as he picked himself up, dusted himself off, and began to walk away.

As I watched his hindside roam farther and farther from me, it felt as if a part of me were being ripped out. I couldn't let him get away.

Quickly, I got up off the ground, and ran after him.

When I caught up to him, I tugged forcefully at his shirt, and we both reeled into a vacant alley.

I pressed him to the wall, a tall, slender side to a restaurant. I was surprised to find his face marred with a scowl.

"Mush…"

"Haven't you done enough?" He struggled against me, but I held him, barely.

I couldn't let him escape. Spot was wonderful, he was true, faithful and provided me with the most impure love I had ever experienced…but Mush…he meant so much to me. Spot was lust and love, but I was sure that this was pure…true, untouched love.

I pressed my lips vigorously to his, despite his yelp of surprise, and rejection to me. I kissed his cheek, my lips roving down his gullet, and back, trying to enjoy the moment, which wasn't much of one, as he tried to fend me off.

"Stop it, Jack."

"I love you, Mush." I declared, with a smile upon my lips.

"I don't care." His gaze averted automatically to the ground next to us.

I tilted his chin towards me, firmly holding it there.

"Look me in the eyes and tell me you don't love me." I loosened my grip on him.

He looked me in the eyes. His expression was hard, and his bottom lip trembled a bit before he managed to spit out the words, which would haunt me until my dying day.

"I don't love you." With that, he shoved me away from him, but I had nearly done that myself, backing away in shock. He spun on his heel, and walked out of the alley.

I sank to the ground, my back against the wall. I didn't have to be ashamed of the tears as they flowed from my eyes. There was no on there to see them, save the rats that scurried along my ragged boots, and through the garbage-ridden alley.


	8. If Looks Could Kill III

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If Looks Could Kill III  
By Stepherz

****

Mush's POV

Instead of going back to the lodging house, where I'm sure Jack would come searching for me - for nothing less than to silence me forever.

Yes, I was scared of him. I'd seen him when he got violent…I'd been the motive of it once. He'd caused a lot of damage, mostly to my mentality, but we got over that…I didn't see us getting over this.

I made straight for Brooklyn. It seemed like a spiteful thing to do, but really…Spot needed to know.

I was nearing the bridge when Blink called out to me. I turned around, and shot him a dirty look - he didn't seem to notice.

"Hey, Mush!" He called, but I kept walking.

He ran to catch up to me, and I frowned at him.

"What do you want?" I snapped, and he looked slightly taken aback.

"Umm…it's almost curfew." I raised an eyebrow and looked loathingly across the bridge at Brooklyn. I sighed and nodded, shaking my head gently.

"Okay.."

We walked back in silence, and my head hurt from thinking so much.

I'd told Jack I didn't love him…

****

Jack's POV

As I watched him walk away, I got up and brushed myself off. The tears, still streaming down my cheeks, meant nothing to him, so I inhaled a shaky breath and wiped them away.

I knew what I had to do.

I slipped silently from the alley. I walked quickly, with my head down, to the Brooklyn Bridge. When I reached it, I looked absently out over it. I started the long trek across the suspension bridge.

Once across, I went straight to where I knew the Brooklyn Newsies would stay. I didn't go to the lodging house, but to the dock. Curfew wasn't yet upon us, so they'd be there.

Spot immediately saw me, and jumped down from his perch. He'd done this countless times before. With a smirk on his face that said _"Back so soon?"_he greeted me.

I frowned at him and shook my head. His smile faded immediately.

"Spot, we need to talk."

The rest of the Brooklyn Newsies were staring as Spot nodded, and we walked off the dock.

Once we were safe from the eyes of the rest of them, Spot turned and stopped me, putting his hand on my chest.

"What's this all about, Jacky-boy?" I cringed at the use of my pet name.

"Spot…" I began shakily, "We can't do this anymore."

The look on his face was not a trifle one. It was rueful, and confused…hurt and angry… above all, it was neutral…he also showed relief and glee. I could see them all pass his expression, one after the other.

"I'm sorry, Spot." He shook his head…overall; his expression was neutral again.

He shrugged nonchalantly, and turned away from me. This made me more nervous…calm before the storm, right?

He was biting his lip, and I sighed softly. He turned sharply and began to stare me down.

"Why?" He demanded. I was caught off guard… I hadn't prepared a reason for him!

"Uh…um…It's not working." He eyed me…it had 'worked' for years.

"If you say so, Jack. Just so long as you ain't lyin' to me." He sure knew how to lay on the guilt.

I stammered, and caught myself, frowning.

"I've found some one else." His nose twitched, and his facials seized an angry air, though remaining neutral, as always.

"Who is it?" Still calm…

I shook my head.

"I can't tell you that." He looked angry now, and narrowed his eyes at me.

"And why not?"

"It's personal…and I don't want you to go rip-roaring after him!" He nodded slowly.

"So it _is_ a him…" More of a statement than a question. I nodded. 

He shook his head and waved his hand.  
"Get out of my sight before I kill you." I knew he would too…I cared about him too much to hurt him, but his emotions were second to his safety. If he thought I would go around telling everyone about us, he'd most certainly silence me.

I walked quickly back across the bridge, and sighed with relief once I was there.

****

Mush's POV

When we got to the lodging house, I wasn't in the best of moods. I was surrounded by the Manhattan Newsies almost immediately. Apparently David hadn't spread the word, and they all wanted to know where I'd been, and things of that sort.

I shook my head, and held up my hands at their questions. I could only do so many things to get back at him, and ratting out to his lowly subjects wouldn't be one of them.

I wasn't happy, but I wasn't about to do something that awful.

Seconds later, Jack walked in. He was also bombarded with questions, which he, in turn, ignored.

He walked towards me, with the most triumphant smile upon his lips that I'd ever seen him wear. He looked more elated than when we'd won the strike…

This was gonna be a good explanation, and I'd bet my life on _that_.

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****

Note - Sorry it's taken me so long to update…. I'll try and be more 'on the ball' with the next chapter.


	9. Release the Hounds

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Release the Hounds  
By Stepherz

Mush's POV

He pushed through the throng of newsboys, and grabbed my arm. If it weren't for the look on his face, I wouldn't have allowed him to so much as touch me. He ushered me back through the crowd and, still ignoring the others, led me outside.

A single look from Jack, and no one dared follow us.

He kept leading me, farther and farther away from the lodging house. When he shoved me into an alley and stalked in after me, I began to grow nervous. Why was he taking me away from the others? And after everything, why would he even show his face there? He stood with his back towards me, and was slowly turning around.

I expected to see his face contorted with anger, or malevolence. But when he looked at me, it was just the opposite. His features were upturned in a smile, and his eyes glittered warmly. I shuddered, and stepped away from him, as he advanced. But he shook his head, and I stopped dead in my tracks.

"Don't go, Mush…" He wasn't pleading, and he wasn't demanding… it was somewhere in the middle.

I didn't go anywhere.

He shifted towards me, and although I had to fight the urge to flee, I did nothing of the sort. His smile was unfaltering, and I looked away, confused. How could he be smiling? There was nothing to smile about.

Or so I thought.

****

Jack's POV

He was more skittish than I expected him to be, but I tried to ignore that. As I walked towards him, I could see the damage I'd done. I planned to undo that, and very soon. His eyes were red, and bloodshot, and his forehead was covered with beads of sweat. I reached out, and brushed them away with my hand.

Damp tendrils of his black, curly hair loomed upon his forehead as well, and frayed out it tufts behind his ears. I shook my head fondly, as he flinched, and stepped back.

I furrowed my brows at his actions, but still said nothing. I knew he was confused as to my change in attitude. He probably thought that I was in denial about the entire thing. Either that, or he thought that I was the biggest nonce he'd ever met, and that I had no conscience at all.

I had to say something, or he was going to get more upset.

"Mush?" I started softly, crooning gently to him. "Please…listen to what I have to say."

He stopped and stared at me, and I knew I had his undivided attention.

****

Mush's POV

I was waiting for him to say something, and I thought for a moment that he wouldn't say anything at all, but just expected me to pay attention to him, as if he were about to speak. That alone confused me more!

I blinked at him several times, but waited patiently.

"Mush…I love you." That was it? Is that what he dragged me out here to say? I opened my mouth to speak, but he held up his hand at me, and I fell silent.

"I love you more than anything. I would give up everything, just so I could be with you." He licked his lips, and I bit my own. Yeah… he would give up everything…except Spot.

He proved me wrong.

"I…I ended it with Spot." My eyes dilated, and I found my jaw hanging slightly open. I stared at him, as if he'd just told me the world was going to explode, in shock.

The sun had set by now, and we were alone, in that dark alley, with nothing but the stars to flicker across the tension on our faces. I could see him, but barely. The moon had decided not to show itself on that particular night. His expression was etched by the dim luminescence. I could see the solemnity in his eyes, and I believed him.

I half-smiled, not knowing exactly how to react. Jack beamed at me.

"You did?" My voice was quavering, and it sounded weak to my own ears. He seemed not to notice, and nodded slowly.

"Yes." He looked about ready to leave it at that, but thought twice and stepped towards me, wrapping his arms around my waist.

"I gave him up…just for you." He whispered huskily into my ear, and I quivered gently as his hot breath maneuvered down my neck.

He really _did_ love me, then.

****

Jack's POV

He smiled, and I kissed his cheek. He trembled in delight, and I made my way to his lips. He was a bit reluctant, and I didn't blame him, but I inhaled his mouth in a delicate, tender kiss.

This was possibly the most romantic moment I'd ever had with him, but I wasn't letting that slow me down. I didn't need to savor it, but I did anyway.

I had been relieved to find that he hadn't told the rest of them about me. I'd made an excuse to each one when the time came up, or just told them that it was a one-time thing, and that it would never work with the rest of them around. If they found out that I'd been lying, and playing them all for fools, they'd have declared war on me for sure.

I was still nervous about Spot…I wasn't sure why. As long as I didn't let loose that he wasn't 'normal' there wouldn't be much of a problem. Only one thought crossed my mind as I devoured Mush's lips in that dark alley.

That thought was of confusion. I _was_ nervous…and the only thing that was really bothering me, was something that I couldn't piece together.

Finally, our kiss died down, and we stood, with our arms wrapped tightly around each other… the bond was nearly unbreakable.

Come to find out… there was only one person who could break this bond. Just one…that's all it took.

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AN - Another cliffhanger! Gosh, I'm really sorry… there's going to be more fluffy moments now, but it won't last forever…you hear me? Nothing good lasts forever [actually, that's the name of the next chapter! lol]


	10. Nothing Good Lasts Forever

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Mush's POV

It had been a few hours, and I stirred gently within Jack's strong, comforting arms. I loved him; there was no doubt about that…

What I _did_ doubt, was that Jack would keep his word… or that I would keep mine.

I was unsure of our relationship, and how stable it was.

As I lay, curled in his loving embrace, bitter thoughts took hold of my mind. I tried to push them from my brain, and in my struggle, I woke up Jack.

He smiled at me, "Well…hello." He winked, and I grinned… my grin was half-hearted, though.

I suppose what _really_ irked me, was the fact that I was a virgin…and Jack wasn't.

All the lies that he'd been keeping from me… How could I _really_ trust in him after that? To me, it was honestly an unrealistic fantasy.

We both giggled, and pressed our foreheads together.

Following, and pressing out lips together, Jack's tongue snaked out of his mouth, evading my teeth and dancing across my own tongue. I pressed his back with mine, rolling it against the inside of his cheek and across his palate.

My doubt had temporarily vanished, and Jack had my undivided attention.

"Mmm…Mush…I got it!" He sat up suddenly, and I laughed at him.

"Oh, yeah? As good as your strike idea?" I winked at him, and he blushed.

"Nah…better! We're gonna move far, far away… and we'll get married!"

I burst out laughing. A suggestion like that was utterly ridiculous, and obviously unheard of.

He elbowed me. "I'm serious." I smiled at him. "Yeah…Mush, you can be my beautiful blush-"

I snorted. "Yes, I would love to be your beautiful, blushing virgin bride in a frilly white dress and corset."

He laughed. "Well…I wouldn't go _that_ far." I kissed his nose.

"Aww… too bad." We both giggled, and he poked my stomach.

"With a belly like that, you won't need a corset."

I began to blush, and he grinned.

I slugged him playfully, and chuckled. "I hope you saved that scab-suit…it's the best thing you own."

He growled playfully, and pounced at me, pinning me on my back on the cobblestone.

"Woof!" I shouted, and he buried his head in my neck, sucking at my pulse point.

"I will suck your blood." He muttered gruffly, and I began to flail my arms, pretending that he had me trapped.

"Please! Don't hurt me!" He winked at me and kissed my forehead, ruffling my hair.

"I wouldn't dream of it."

He rested his head on my chest, and I stroked his hair.

Soon, his breathing slowed to a stead, even cadence and his eyes drooped shut.

Not long after, I myself fell into a silent slumber.

A while later, when I woke up, he was gone…and I was alone with my doubt…

Not a good combination.

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AN - I am **_so_** sorry that this has taken me so long, and that it's so short. The next chapter will be MUCH longer, and I just have to type it up… *grin* Yes… You'll all hate me for spoiling their fun… but it gives me something to write, no? hehe


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